You’re a porn star, just doing what you do…. when suddenly your costar calls you a bitch.
Do you: A. Bite him? B. Give him a nasty look? or C. Keep sucking… it up and finish?
(Warning ahead of time: Content/language is explicit in the below vid). But while we’re on the language topic, this video raised a larger cultural query for some: “Why does the N-bomb get dropped so frequently within the African American Community?” The “-er” ending is almost never heard – unless your intentions are deliberately disparaging – but why use it at all?
What it comes down to, is something I like to call the “exclusivity invective”.
It’s that same thing you’ll see in any circle of any human beings that have been victimized at some point in time, regardless of whether its source was extremely violent or trivial in comparison. Our defense mechanism is often to “beat people to the punch” if we know they might point out something they perceive to be a flaw. Example: Comedians spotlight straight away they’re a ginger or Asian all the time, and then joke about how they respectively have no soul or can’t drive but are great at math. It’s okay for them to say it. It’s okay for you to laugh.
But it’s not so cool for you to say that joke about them unless you’re “part of the club”.
In this case, the performer isn’t just “black”. She’s also a chick. It starts with her being called “bitch” during a scene. Women on a whole call each other “bitch”, “slut”, and “whore” all the time – and depending on the tone – it’s often just to be friendly. Is it okay for men to say it, though? Not unless you’re her gay best friend. I highly doubt if she was a bi-performer and heard “Yeah, b*tch! Don’t stop!” from a female co-star, that she would have been half as livid.
Mr. Pumper is clearly not her gay friend, however (seeing as he was literally “pumping” her). Thus, she backfires by drawing on something else they culturally share in common (race) and strikes using the next-best thing: Repeatedly screaming the N-bomb at him. Not “dick”. Not “asshole”. Not “MotherFkkr”. Just the N-bomb.
The beauty of the “exclusivity invective” is its fine-line dynamic nature. Depending on the context, it can be the single quickest way to demonstrate endearment one moment or scathingly cut to the core the next… all without technically being taboo or committing a social faux pas.